Single and nervous!

Trying for a family as a single parent?
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RugbyChick82
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Single and nervous!

#1 Post by RugbyChick82 » Wed Jan 15, 2020 6:00 pm

Hi all!

I'm new to this and so pleased to see that there are other people in my shoes!!! I have to be honest my biggest concern is what people will think! My immediate family has been great but I have no idea what other people will think!

I know I shouldn't worry about this, it's about me and my baby (hopefully!). Did anyone else feel this??

N

Sunbeam09
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Joined: Sun Nov 10, 2019 8:01 pm

Re: Single and nervous!

#2 Post by Sunbeam09 » Wed Jan 15, 2020 7:06 pm

Hi,

I understand what you mean, like you I have support from friends, family around me.
I haven't told everyone what i am doing as i know what some may say...i don't want their opinion.
Hopefully my treatment will work and after i know all is well i will tell those who ask. X
MMC April 2019 💔
1st IVF cycle January 2020 - negative

ElaineT
Posts: 11
Joined: Sat Dec 28, 2019 7:47 pm

Re: Single and nervous!

#3 Post by ElaineT » Thu Jan 16, 2020 12:26 am

I think if I go through with this and everything went well I’d just be like “I’m doing this alone” that’s all people need to know. I mean people like work colleagues and some family. It’s nobody’s business about fathers.

RugbyChick82
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Re: Single and nervous!

#4 Post by RugbyChick82 » Sat Jan 18, 2020 1:12 pm

It's so nice to know I'm not alone in this!
My latest issue is that I am being pressured to tell relatives and I just don't know if I'm ready for that. It's so much to process myself let alone having questions from people!

donnielime
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Joined: Mon May 27, 2019 1:47 pm

Re: Single and nervous!

#5 Post by donnielime » Sat Jan 18, 2020 9:00 pm

Hello Rugbychick

Good luck with the process and your decisions. I had ICSI treatment last autumn starting in September and am currently 14 weeks pregnant. I didn't tell anyone what i was doing until I needed a lift for egg collection and I confided in one friend, who was (and has been since) really supportive. I finally told my parents on Christmas Eve that I am pregnant (I was 10.5 weeks by then and had had my early scan at Care), they were so shocked and excited but I then swore them to secrecy as I wanted to wait till the 12 week scan (and screenings) before I told anyone. My parents are fit for bursting. I had my 12 week scan the week before last and have since told my boss and a couple of other people at work (ie HR/ H&S etc) but there are still only about 10 people who know - mostly work people for work reasons. Their reactions have been really supportive and positive.

I am just enjoying it being 'my' news and my business at the minute. Don't be pressurised or rushed into sharing with people, if you don't want it. It's your business. I couldn't face the questions and sympathy if things didn't work.

Are you aware of 'The Stork and I Mum tribe' community on facebook? It's a private group of single mothers by choice who are a great source of advice and support.

Good luck!!

DonnieLime
me : single lady 40 - donor sperm
1st cycle - ICSI - Sept/Oct 2019 4 eggs, 2 fertilised, 2 3day embryos transferred = BFP <3
Due date 17/07/20

RugbyChick82
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Re: Single and nervous!

#6 Post by RugbyChick82 » Sun Jan 19, 2020 12:39 pm

Hi Donnie,

Thank you so much for your reply. It makes me feel so much better knowing that I'm not the only one who is going through it! I've told immediate family (parents, brothers) but I'm getting a bit of pressure to tell my Nan. I think it might be because my Dad is worried about her health, age, etc. But I keep thinking if I tell her she will tell my Aunt and cousins (rubbish secret keeper!), which isn't the end of the world but it's the questions and the pity if it doesn't work! Work asked to see a clinic letter to prove it was a medical appointment, managed to swing it without but was really worried for a bit!

I've been writing a blog to help me get my thoughts down but will definitely check out that facebook group!

Thanks :D

RugbyChick82
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Re: Single and nervous!

#7 Post by RugbyChick82 » Sun Jan 19, 2020 12:57 pm

I also meant to say congrats Donnie! You must be so excited and happy! :D

wendymw
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Re: Single and nervous!

#8 Post by wendymw » Fri Feb 07, 2020 9:58 pm

Hi ladies

It’s a long time since I’ve been on these forums, but wanted to check if there were any other single ladies starting on their journey.

12 years ago I decided I go it alone. It took me 2 rounds of IVF to have my first son and another 3 to have my second. My boys are 10 and 6 now and it’s the best decision ever. It’s hard work, but I wouldn’t change it. My parents were great and friends were too.

So, this was really just to say good luck to you all. It’s daunting, but you won’t regret it.

Wendy xx

RugbyChick82
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Re: Single and nervous!

#9 Post by RugbyChick82 » Mon Feb 10, 2020 10:54 pm

Thank you so much Wendy!!! It's so good to hear from someone further down the line!

wendymw
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Re: Single and nervous!

#10 Post by wendymw » Mon Feb 10, 2020 11:17 pm

You’re welcome Rugbychick. It feels strange when I think how long ago I did it, it only seems like 2 minutes. I made lots of friends on these boards, their support was invaluable.

Best of luck!
W

RugbyChick82
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Re: Single and nervous!

#11 Post by RugbyChick82 » Wed Mar 04, 2020 3:41 pm

I had my AMH results, 18.8.. I had to ask what it meant as I have found the numbers on line very confusing! Apparently this is good! Yeay!! :D

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